Finding the BEST Preschool

CBC television recently aired a documentary called Hyper Parents & Coddled Kids  It discussed how parenting somehow has become more about producing a “product” than raising a child.  Many parents do whatever it takes to make THEM look good.

I’m co-leading a parenting group for the next few weeks.  A mom recently brought me aside and very seriously asked me what I thought of Montessorri Preschool.  I told her that I really didn’t know enough about it to give her an informed opinion.  A lot of my clients have sent their kids to Montessorri and have had a variety of experiences.  Some swear by it and others question it.  I told this mom to visit a few preschools and find one where she likes the teacher, there is a variety of toys to play with, and she feels confident her child is going to have a positive experience.  I suggested she listen to her intuition.

Preschool is NOT about finding a school that is going to prepare your child for entry into Harvard or any other university for that matter.  It’s an opportunity to socialize with children their own age, learn to separate from you or their primary caregiver, and have a variety of age appropriate toys and activies to actively engage in.  To my knowledge there is absolutely no research that says sending your child to the “right” preschool is going to better equip them for a successful life. 

The mom is our group told us  she and her husband have heard of certain schools that start to teach children good study skills.  My co-leader said:  “If I walked into a school where 3 year olds were learning to study I would turn around and run as fast as I could the other direction.”  I said:  “I would too.”. To me, a lot of structured learning would be a big red flag.  Preschoolers need to PLAY and PLAY some more.  Play is how they learn and is what they need to be doing a lot of.  They also need to learn how to socialize. 

Preschool is also a time children learn to adjust to other adults and to adapt to the rules in a different environment from home.  You want to find a place where children are loved and respected and the focus is not on academics but on play that involves both gross and fine motor activies.  It is NOT a preparation for university.  Young children don’t need that kind of pressure and if we have a strong need for them to “succeed” when they’re 3 and 4 years old, they’ll feel it.